Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Listen Here, Bed Bath & Beyond,

Compliments of being medicated, I don't get my panties in a wad quite as easily as I once did. That is, until, last night when perusing your website.

You see, I happen to love my name. I am named after both of my grandmother's (Mary & Martha Anne) and the vintage, classy, feminine sound of it fits me perfectly. I also love the spelling, because it's less common (and I hate anything popular) and I don't really like dual first names.

Unfortunately, not everyone shares these sentiments. I have found myself defending my name on many occasions. Others feel the need to say, "Oh, that's my dead grandma's name," Or, "My senile great-aunt who once was convicted of murder is named that." I mean, really? Thanks, people. Because we all want to be told we share a name with an old-fart with a criminal past. Ok, fine, no one has told me that their aunt was a convicted murderer, but it's only a matter of time. Or people have literally straight up told me my name is ugly.

And you, Bed Bath & Beyond, you are doing little to assist in my efforts in proving that Marianne is a beautiful name by pulling this kind of stunt:


I'm pissed, BBB! Y'all are rude. What the hell did my name ever do to you? Peggy Sue or Mabel are clearly better picks for that country crap. UGH!

No offense to anyone named Peggy Sue or Mabel, I'm sure you're lovely, but they are country names, aren't they? Marianne is not country.



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9 comments:

Casey said...

You're totally right. That is atrocious. If I ever change professions and end up in the Bedding Naming Business, rest assured that I'll name the cute stuff after you!

The Mama said...

I sooooo understand. My mother was nice enough to name me Virginia. I'm pretty much destined to work as a greeter at Wal*Mart or smell like mothballs because I'll never be as cute as Virginia Madsen. Yay for a bright future!

Melissa said...

I like your name and I think it's pretty... it is an "older" name meaning that it has been aroudn for a while and so it has a history (people have relatives with that name). But who cares? It has a lot of character and it's you. Go Marianne!

Katherine said...

I think your name is very pretty....and that quilt is VERY undeserving of it.

Momma Fargo said...

That is a quilt that in no way describes your magnificient-ness. Off with their heads!

Anne said...

haha! I concur. That is the UGLIEST bedding I have ever seen. But your name is super pretty!!! I am going to boycott BBB :-)

Pennie said...

You're hilarious! From, your bloggy friend...NOT "Penny - you know, I have a dog named Penny..." or, the boys in high school used to say, "I'm a penny pincher...." very funny. And I NEVER had ANYONE say "Hey, Nickel - " NEVER heard that one!

Pam said...

Oh shit Marianne, this is bad. This is very bad. Sorry.

Helene said...

Oh man, that sucks...SUCKS, I tell you!!

If it makes you feel any better, I usually hear, "Oh, my grandma was named Helen". Okay, yeah...good for your freakin grandma. I said Helene, not Helen. What does one have to do with the other? Sometimes I wish my parents had just named me Michelle.

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