Monday, May 30, 2011

Monday Minute: It's Baaaaaack!

Guess what, folks! Ian is back!!! And not only is HE back, but so is the MONDAY MINUTE!!!! He's actually been back for a few weeks, but I'm finally getting around to doing it again. Welcome back, bud, it's good to see you in these parts again.

Wanna play? Answer the questions & link up.

1. Aside from your armpits, what body part of yours sweats the most?
I see your penchant for questions about bodily functions is still strong, huh Ian? Um, I sweat a lot, but I'll say my forehead or chest.

2. You have two slices of bread. You can add one additional ingredient to make a sandwich, but as much as you want. What are you putting on it?
Peanut butter, without a doubt.

3. Can you put your entire fist in your mouth?
I used to be able to, both horizontally & vertically. I used to take voice lessons, so my jaw became quite flexible with all those exercises to loosen it up. But I'm pretty sure it's one of the reasons I have TMJ syndrome now haha.

4. Open your email. How many emails do you have in your 'inbox'?
Ugh. 20 in my personal account, my blog account has 26. I'm about to do some mass responding to get rid of them.

5. If an adult male is taken for ransom, is it considered a kidnapping?
Well, I would say yes, but then I read Ian's answer & now I think it should be kidnapped, not kidnapping. But you know what? An adult male isn't a kid (technically, although maturity wise? Probably.), so shouldn't it be, "mannapped" or "guysnatched" or something like that? Registered & Protected

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

The Kind of Parent I Won't Be

I won't...

*say, "Because I said so, that's why!" (even though I say this fairly regularly while babysitting).

*allow most battery operated toys. I hate them all & am fully convinced no toy inventor is actually a parent himself.

*have so many bloody toys, that it's all people will notice when they walk into my home. Especially baby gear. My word, how is there so much stuff on the market for infants? They eat, they sleep, they poop. Bottles, bed, diapers. Boom, done.

*say things like, "My house, my rules," "As long as you live under this roof, the answer is no," "Don't get smart with me!" "Eat your food, there are starving children in Africa," "Because I'm the adult," "Don't make stop this car!" and, my all-time favorite, "Don't make me count to 3, mister!"

*allow video games or computer games unless they are educational.

*use the TV as a babysitter.

*argue with my husband in front of the kids.


*be a helicopter parent.

*be a better friend than parent.

*allow my children to develop poor eating habits.

*speak as if I'm the first parent in the history of the world or complain about how hard it is.

*judge another parent for the way they choose to raise their kids.

*take the gift of being a mother for granted.

*be surprised if I actually end up doing or saying at least half of these things. Registered & Protected

Monday, May 23, 2011

The things I do for a good laugh.

I just joined

I have very high expectations.

Not that I will find a mate. Or even go on a date, for that matter. But to have some hilarious correspondence's via email so that I can dissect them & share them with all of you. After all, my stories from eharmony & are, hands down, the bests posts I've ever written.

You're welcome. Registered & Protected

Friday, May 20, 2011

Nursing School Shtuff

Nursing school starts on July 5th and I think the reality of everything is really starting to hit me (read: slight panic, slight nervousness, slight ohmygodwhatamidoing, slight pleasedontfail, major freaking out.)

I received an email the other day with my schedule for my first session, which is 4 weeks, or something like that.

MWF: 8am-11am: Foundations of Nursing
12pm-3pm: Pathophysiology

TTH: 8am-9:20am: Principles of Intervention (I wish I could tell you what this entails..)
9:30am-10:55am OR 11:10am-12:30pm: Principles of Intervention Lab

And, of course, I'll spend more time on campus for lab practice & skills practice for the Lab class.

Clinicals start after this session is over, so in August. Also, after this first session, the rest of my classes are broken up into 7 week sessions, with no more than 10 credit hours a session (that doesn't include clinical hours).

People keep telling me how intense this program is going to be and they'd kill themselves if they were doing such a fast program (seriously, a few have said that), and blah blah. Honestly, I'm kind of sick of hearing it. I just hate when people are negative about something someone else is so excited about. Obviously it's going to be hard, I'm not so naive to think otherwise. But I've worked my ass off in school my entire life, especially these past two years, so I feel prepared for the challenge. Also on my side is the fact that I won't be working at all, I'm single, with no children, I'm living in a town that is dead, and I'm ONLY taking nursing classes and clinicals-- I have all the other "fluff" classes required for a bachelor's degree finished. I will literally have zero distractions and zero reason to not do well. I think I'll be perfectly fine busting my butt for 13 months-- it's literally going to be over before I even realize it!

So, all you negative nelly's, shut it. Thanks.

In related news, I've purchased my shoes & stethoscope. For shoes, I bought a pair of Dansko Professional Clogs (side note: The one regret I have about going into nursing? Not being able to look chic and fashionable and like I belong on the streets of Manhattan. I try not to think about it so I don't cry...). I need to break the new shoes in, but I've heard they are the best thing to wear for medical professionals and they have a ton of arch support. They are stupid expensive though, but I bought them at a store called Englin's and they give 10% off to healthcare workers.

My stethoscope I ordered from this online site called Medisave. Littmann's are the creme de la creme in the stethoscope world, but are also stupid expensive. I found the one I wanted-- Classic S.E. II (in ocean blue, no less) on this site for a discounted price & they offered free engraving. I thought the engraving was kind of cheesy, but I've been told people tend to get sticky fingers when Littmann's are around, so I had my name engraved (unfortunately, my real name, not Marianne Fancypants :'( ). The shipping was super fast, too!

And, finally, tomorrow I am taking a CPR class to become certified. The darn thing is from 8-5. Seriously?! That seems slightly excessive to me, especially on a Saturday. C'est la vie.

So that's all the new stuff pertaining to school I have to report. Hope you all are doing well! Congrats to my nursing blog buddies who finished their semesters successfully, & a HUGE congrats to Kara, for graduating from nursing school! Good luck on NCLEX!

ps, I'm 24 today and really trying to not freak out. I guarantee I'll have a quarter-life crisis next year, if not before then. More on that later...

Have a good weekend, friends!

*I tried to upload pics of my goods, but blogger is being a pill right now. Y'all probably don't care anyway hah.* Registered & Protected

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Book Review: Water for Elephants

If you haven't heard of this book by now, you clearly live on the (non) planet Pluto. I heard about the book a few years ago, but forgot about it until a couple months ago when I sought out my facebook friends for book suggestions. I think 5 different people suggested it and said it was amazing, wonderful, best book ever, blah blah blah. With such accolades, and my borderline obsession with elephants, I knew I needed to add it to my list, especially since there is now a movie version with Reese Witherspoon and 98% of the time, I refuse to see a movie before I read the book.

Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen alternates between the Depression era of 1931 and 2001. In 1931, Jacob Jankowski is in the final weeks of veterinary school at Cornell when tragedy strikes and he runs away from life as he knows it. Wandering around the railroad tracks, he hops a train that ends up changing his life. The train is carrying equipment for the Benzini Brothers Most Spectacular Show on Earth-- a circus. He is immersed in the culture and lives to recount an eventful, sometimes harrowing, time in his life 70 years later.

I know that's a really vague summary, but if you pick up the book, you'll notice that no where is there a synopsis of what the book is about. I literally had no clue what I was going to be reading about and now, after having read the book, I know why. Literally every detail from beginning to end is linked to another detail-- sharing one would undoubtedly ruin an event later in the book. It's best to go into it knowing as little as possible so that it is the page turner it is meant to be.

And the book is just that: a real page turner. I read half of it today alone, the other half split up into two days. For one, I'm a real sucker for anything historically based between 1920 and 1970 and am a very visual reader, so while reading, I was acting it out in my mind. And like watching a movie for the first time, I had to know what happened in the end. I also found my self entranced with learning about circus life-- something I consider to be a major part of 20th Century America. Gruen also splits it up into young Jacob and old, nursing home Jacob. I liked young Jacob's "scenes" better, but was more moved by the "scenes" with old Jacob.

Since people hyped it up so much, I had really high expectations. I definitely thought it was a good book, incredibly well written, and very well researched, but I didn't close it thinking, "OH MY GOSH! THAT WAS THE BEST BOOK EVAHHHHHH." I'm glad I read it, and it certainly was fascinating, but I've been more impacted by other books.

Overall: I'd recommend it, and am glad I read it, but don't fully expect to walk away with some mind-blowing experience.

*image from via google images* Registered & Protected

Monday, May 16, 2011

&%$! You Shouldn't Say: The Debut

I briefly mentioned this in my last post a couple weeks ago (whoops), but a month or so ago, after a night out with my girlfriends that was filled with ridiculous pick-up lines, I decided I need to write a blog called, "Shit you shouldn't say when you're trying to hit on a girl." I did intend to give it it's own site, but setting up a new blog is a pain in the tukus and I figured it could be a fun little series to just do on this blog, to bring some spice back.

On Friday night I went out with my friends and the idea came up again, but someone suggested instead of making it just pick-up lines & instead of making it only specific to things said to girls, it should just be, "Shit you shouldn't say." Thinking about all the ridiculous things I hear (and say), I agreed.

But, you know me, an idea is never fully developed. So now it's going to encompass a litany of things not to say OR do in any given situation.

While my life is rather eventful on most days and I probably could provide a stellar amount of my own stories about ridiculous things that have been said or done to me or in my presence, I'd rather not talk about me, me, me all the time. SO, that's where you come in: I want YOUR stories.

Rack your brains for the most ridiculous pick-up lines, questions, statements ever said to your or in your presence. Can't think of anything? What about a jaw-dropping situation you found yourself in? Obviously I hope to keep this thing going for a while, so if something happens in 3 weeks, send it in then!

Send submissions to and put Shit you Shouldn't Say as the subject.

And because I want you all to love this idea, here's the first one for ya.

"Have you ever had your belly button touched? From the inside?"

My friend was the recipient of this lovely little line. We still haven't decided on appropriate reactions, but I'm not convinced castration is totally out of line.

Now think, type, & send me your stories! Registered & Protected

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Random Ramblings

~Sometimes I wonder how much alcohol is drunk or drugs are smoked before people post on facebook or twitter. Then I wonder how many people ask the very same question when they read my posts.

~Also FB related, people who whine, bitch, complain, are negative, or have FML at the end of their status the majority of the time are either being blocked from my newsfeed or deleted from my friends. If you have a roof over your head, bills paid, food on the table, clothes on your back, good health, and love in your life, you have nothing to be THAT unhappy about. Open your eyes and gain some perspective.

~I haven't gone out with my girlfriends in a month. I'm so not OK with this, but we've all been busy. Hopefully this problem is corrected, like, yesterday.

~Obama isn't releasing the photos of bin Laden. Personally, I think this was a horrible decision. I don't necessarily need to see the corpse, but you know a ton of people are going to speculate that he wasn't really killed.

~I'm so bloody sick of the battle with my weight.

~I finished my last pre-nursing class today. Actually, for the program I am doing, I was done last summer, but that's neither here nor there. Anyway, I got a 97 on my final and overall, so I'm happy!

~I'm considering joining a free online dating site solely for the entertainment factor it brings. Lord knows I love a good laugh, but I love, even more, to write about the hilarious encounters. Site suggestions are welcome.

~Speaking of dating, I had the brilliant idea after a night out a month or so ago to start a new blog called, "Shit you shouldn't say (or do) if you're trying to hit on a girl." Then I tried to set up a blog and immediately remembered how long it took me to get all the kinks worked out on here and really just wasn't up for doing it again. So what if I do a little "series" on this blog? Would y'all like that? If so, send me some of your stories, or even a guest post!

~Sometimes such ridiculous things happen to me that I would LOVE to blog about, but hold back because of how many people who read this know me in real life.

~I'm still jealous of Kate Middleton (how gorgeous did she look on her wedding day? Natural beauty!). Anyone know how I can woo Harry and convince him to make me a princess? HRH Princess Marianne CUH-LEARLY has a phenomenal ring to it. And not to be cocky, but I think I'm better looking than Sarah Ferguson and she became a princess (and produced two off-spring that looked utterly ridiculous at their cousins wedding...), so I have a shot? No? Awww, come on!

~I'm getting my haircut done next Friday and I am dying to dye it. I've never had any color treatment done, but I'm so bored with my look and want to mix it up. I'm thinking something like Kate Middleton or Pia Toscano.

~I'll be 24 in 16 days! Some days, I can't believe I'm that old, others, I can't believe I'm that young.

~I'm in a completely different state of my mind than I was a year ago and I am loving it. I have an entire post about it in the works, but suffice it to say, things are on the up & up. Registered & Protected

Monday, May 2, 2011

Apartment Hunting: Complete!

Within hours of getting my acceptance letter to nursing school, I was online looking for an apartment. The town I'm moving to is BUH-ROKE. It's an old factory town that has very little going for it, other than the university I am attending. Decent housing options are definitely hard to come by & I don't qualify for campus housing since I'm "an adult," which is funny, because aren't all the students in college legally adults?


I got online and stumbled upon a great prospect on craigslist. I drove up and looked at the apartment two days later and thought it was perfect, but she wanted to fill it immediately, and I wasn't going to sign a lease until mid-June at the earliest. I kept looking, but had that place in the back of my mind.

GOOD THING! She called me a few days later and asked if we could talk and maybe work out an agreement. She agreed to hold the unit until June 15 if I paid a small fee and signed a 14 month lease. Done & done!

So YAY! I signed the lease on my first big girl apartment!!! I get the keys June 15, but I won't move my stuff until the end of June, and myself until July 4.

The apartment is pretty nice and only 3 blocks from campus, which is awesome, so I can walk if I want. It's part of a four-plex, but my unit is the only one on the second floor, so I have ZERO shared walls, except my floor is the ceiling of the dude below me! There's a good sized living/dining area, decent kitchen, big bathroom, two small bedrooms (which is perfect so I don't have to have my desk in my bedroom), a washer/dryer, AND a parking space! She also said I can bring one of my dogs, which will be nice to have some company and added security.

I've pretty much acquired everything I need for the place, too. Fortunately, we had basically all the big things, and a friend gave me a desk and two TVs. The only thing big ticket thing I had to buy was a mattress/box spring/frame, which I got a great deal on.

My room and bathroom are going to be blue and brown, my living area is going to be black, grey, with yellow and plum throw pillows. I'm sure you're wondering why I'm bothering decorating since I'll be there for a relatively short time, but if I'm going to be in a new town that doesn't have a lot to offer, living by myself, and spending a lot of time there, I want it to be comfortable and homey.

Of course, I'll add pics when I move in and have it put together :) Registered & Protected
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