The Season of Giving... & Receiving
Read this post. Trust me, you'll want to.
Christmas is my absolute favorite time of year. From Thanksgiving until January 1st, I forget about how much I despise cold weather and bask in the warmth that is Christmas cheer. Oh, Lord, is that cheesy or what? But I mean it. There's just something about all the decorations, the music, the preparation for the birth of my Lord, that makes me all giddy. But it can also be a stressful time with the end of school, shopping to do, letters to send, volunteer work, etc.
I know I'm not the only person in the world who stresses. Kids, taking care of the home, jobs, finding a job, loved ones who are fighting for our freedom overseas, school, being a good friend and family member-- it can all be so overwhelming and take a toll on the body. I try to use homeopathic remedies (I think that's the term I'm looking for...) when I'm feeling incredibly stressed because Lord knows my body gets pumped full of enough pharmaceuticals as is.
These are a few of my favorite (relaxation) things:
1. Aromatherapy lotion from Bath and Body Works. Greatest. Collection. Ever. I have several bottles, from travel size to full, that I use all the time. I'll rub it in to my knots in my back, neck, and shoulders, on my temples and sinus cavities, and even on my hands and feet before bed time. The various fragrances all smell so good and really do help me relax and unwind.
2. Moisturizing socks from Earth Therapeutics. Oh. My. Gosh. They are SO soft and comfy, have aloe infused in them to help keep your feet from getting dry, and are perfect during the winter when the toesies get cold easily. When I've had a long day, I'll come home and rub some aromatherapy lotion on my feet and slip those socks on before crawling into bed. The feet absorb the lotion and give a relaxing touch to my whole body. Here's a little tip, too: if you have a cough that's keeping you up at night (or is just annoying), rub some Vick's vaporub on your feet and then put socks on. I dare you to tell me you didn't quit coughing within 10 minutes.
3. Anti-stress sinus pillow from Earth Therapeutics. Y'all, I'm not kidding when I say that this is, hands down, my best purchase of all time. I won't even stop short of saying it's been a life saver. I bought it in Boston last October after I borrowed my friends to help nurse a delightful hangover. Little did I know how much I would use it. I stick this bad boy in the microwave more often than not, but especially when I have a headache or migraine. This past spring and summer, I had a migraine at least 4 times a week; I'd heat the mask up for a minute (30 seconds each side) and slip it over my eyes while I fell asleep in the cold cave of my bedroom. It was so soothing and helped alleviate a lot of the pressure. When I have sinus headaches, I'll take out the rice pack and put in a baggie of ice and slip it over my face so it hits the sinus cavities and reduces the swelling (you can freeze the rice pack, I just never have). Even if you're just a little stressed, warm the mask up or pop it in the freezer, slip it over your eyes, lay it on your forehead, or even around your neck and let it help you de-stress.
4. OPI nail polish. It's the only kind I use, even if it is overpriced. Nothing says relaxing like a fresh mani/pedi with some pretty polish!
5. A great book and a warm beverage on the couch. Ok, that's a partial lie. I don't really enjoy warm beverages, but I hear they help heal a stressed out body, especially tea. I do, however, absolutely love to read and can spend hours (and lots of money) in a bookstore finding the perfect books to add to my collection. I don't usually read anything mind-blowing or overly thought provoking though (except I do love a good mystery) because I get enough of the serious talk in my text books and when I read for fun, I generally want to lose myself in the sillyness of a another world. When I'm stressed, nothing beats a book that will make me laugh, like Jen Lancaster's, "Bitter is the New Black." I read it three years ago on a trip and literally laughed out loud the entire time.
6. When all else fails, I'll retreat to my room, light a candle, and eat some chocolate. Doesn't get much better than that!
And now you're probably asking, "Why the hell did I want to read all of that?"
Well, because...
ONE LUCKY READER IS GOING TO WIN EVERYTHING I JUST LISTED!!!!!
Woohoo! It's a holiday giveaway! I originally planned to do a giveaway to honor my one year of blogging, but that's not until the end of January and I can't wait that long because I'm too wrapped up in the holiday spirit and want to give something away now!
And here's the best part: none of this crap of having a chance to have 800 different entries. No tweeting (twitting?), facebooking, blogging about it, spinning in circles while patting your head, rubbing your belly, and trying to lick your elbow bs. I like to keep it fair and give everyone an equal shot, so only one entry per person.
To enter, you must:
1. Leave a comment telling me an embarrassing story about yourself. That's it!
General rules:
1. Make sure you leave an email address at the end of your comment (even if you think your comment is linked to your email, leave the address anyway, just to be safe.)
2. If you are commenting as anonymous, you must identify yourself in your comment, tell me how you found me, and leave a link to your blog (if you have one). Why? If you're going to be getting some goods from me, I'm going to force you to delurk! Neener neener neener.
3. You must live in the Continental US. Unless you want to pay for the shipping (hey, I'm just being honest. Nursing school is expensive, yo). Sorry :(
Tell me that's not easy! Just like every giveaway should be, huh?
The giveaway will END December 19 at NOON (EST). I will choose a winner using random.org and announce it by 8pm (EST) that evening. The prize will ship Tuesday, December 21st (since I work Monday's), just in time for Christmas and some holiday relaxation!
Sorry to all you momma's out there hoping I was giving away free babysitting. But, tell ya what, fly me to you and give me a free place to stay, and I'll watch your kids in return! It's a win-win: I escape Indiana, you get child care.
Good luck! I hope you guys are as excited about the prize as I am to be giving it away!
*Disclaimer: I'm not being compensated in any way for doing this giveaway.*
Comments
**Back story: someone hit my car in a parking lot and drove off about a year ago, and my insurance doesn't cover fixing it so I have just had to deal with it. There is a sharp little piece of metal on my driver's side door that sticks out just enough that if you get poked, you'll be cursing.
ANYWAYS. So about a month ago, I woke up and got ready for work just like any other day. Left the house, got in my car, drove to work, went inside, started working. I had to run downstairs to grab something, but I stopped in my boss' office to ask her a question before I went downstairs. As I was leaving her office and walking down the hall, she said "Jenny, come here and turn around." I immediately started feeling on my back and legs to see if there was something on me, and quickly realized I was feeling skin... that damn sharp metal piece ripped my pants straight down about 8 inches, leaving my ENTIRE left butt cheek exposed to ALL of my coworkers, including my boss. Good one, Jenny. Good one.
jennym419@gmail.com
I was around five or six years old. It was early fall, so still warm enough for me and the daughter of my mom's friend to play outside in the front yard.
I think at some point, my mom must have gotten irritated by the constant in and out that comes with a couple of kids, so the decision was made that we weren't allowed to come back inside until they came to get us.
So, we played. I couldn't tell you if it was an hour or ten minutes, but my friend and I suddenly realized we both had to pee. Bad. I figured I'd just hold it, but my friend was sure there was no way she could.
We had two very large rocks out front, easy enough for us to hide behind without someone from the street seeing us. She went first, without incident. Then, told me to go ahead and do it. I think she may have called me "chicken" when I made it known I wasn't too keen on the idea, especially since I was about 99.9% sure I'd be caught and get in trouble.
Eventually, after thinking about it for a bit, I realized there was no way I could hold it any longer and reluctantly squatted behind the rock.
Right in time for our moms to open the front door and see my bare behind taking a tinkle in the front yard. I obviously couldn't deny it, so I went with the first excuse that came to mind. The "She Did It First" approach.
She, however, chose to lie. Got off scott-free. Me, on the other hand? I paid for it for the majority of my childhood and into my dating years. Any time my parents felt the need to put me and my sassy self in my place, they would utter two words.
The rock.
That still shuts me up pretty quickly.
(thebigfatgini@gmail.com)
OK, embarrassing story?
It's a short one, but still cringe-worthy.
My mom caught me having sex. ::record scratch::
It was with my husband, but still. My mom has never been one to, you know, KNOCK upon entering a room. She busted in my old bedroom one night to tell me something, and saw the backside of my hubby knockin' the doors off, if you know what I mean. Of course, the sudden light from the hallway startled my 6'4" 250 lb. husband, who fell directly onto me, knocking the air out of me for a few moments and leaving me gasping for breath (and not in a good way).
Unfortunately, I would NOT be gasping for air in a good way that evening, because my mom pretty much killed the mood. Imagine that.
It was an awkward breakfast the next day. O_o
Missy0527@gmail.com
Some friends and I were trying to lose weight together and we were all at the park one day, chatting while our kids played. I was bragging about how healthy I had been eating and so proud of myself. Cole sat there listening to me go on and on and then when I stopped talking he said, "Mommy, did you tell them about the ice cream you eat every night after dinner?"
Nothing like a truthful child to keep a Mama honest, right?
I posted an embarrassing story on my blog today....give me a minute while I copy and paste...
Once upon a time, a long, long time ago, I was a fluff girl.
For those of you who don’t know what a fluff girl is, she is a girl in porn who keeps the men stimulated when they are off camera. She keeps them up so they are ready to plow whenever needed.
Ok, so maybe I wasn’t actually a fluff girl….but I sort of did the same thing…
…but for dogs.
Please don’t call PETA on me. I know the dogs liked it. I was a very good doggie fluff girl.
Are you scared yet? I know this sounds so terrible.
Let me explain. When I was in college I worked at an animal hospital. The doctors I worked with were reproduction specialists so I helped with all sorts of weird things that normal people would never admit to doing all over the internet. But very few people have ever called me normal. The weirdest thing I ever had to do was fluff dogs and then jerk them off.
(I cannot believe I am writing this right now!)
I would drench a towel in some pheromone smelling stuff, tie it around my waist so it was covering my ass, and then I would dance around for the male dog until he was “turned on.” Or as we call it in the animal world “his lipstick was out.” When he was ready to go I would give him a handie and collect the sample.
I can’t believe I just admitted to giving dogs handies. That is all kinds of gross.
aaahhheemm...now on to my embarrasing story...
To make a long story short-
I went to the grocery store with a pair of underwear in my pant leg and while I was walking they were dragging on the ground. And of course a guy had to point them out to me. No, I dont randomly lose the underwear I am wearing. They were in my pants from when I had washed them. Honest ;)
My face was so red for hours after!
I have horrible migraines and the slightest thought of something helping me sends me running to the store.
Tell all story: (NO laughing, and I've got lots so in light of your inspiring giveaways I'm gonna post some)
I was about 15 yrs old in basking in all my cuteness while attending a party with my boyfriend whom I was so sure that I was going to marry, have kids with, and live all my days with. I of course was being all cute in my new outfit I got special for out date. White pants, and a beautiful white shirt that had pretty pink sequins all over it.
There we were...all in our cuteness, so in "puppy" love. I was sitting on his lap laughing and dancing (no not a lap dance). I got up to go talk to some of my girlfriends when he says "Uhm you left something behind" I turned around to see a HUGE red spot on his pants and all over my butt! I started my period on my boyfriends leg!
I was humiliated, and I begged my parents to please please please move to another country!
And you KNEW I'd play along!
Honestly, I think I spend half of my week with my foot in my mouth for some reason or another...let's see...
I'll never forget the day in junior high that I tripped walking down the stairs on my way to band (shut up) and flipped ass over tea kettle down many steps while all my books, clarinet, etc scatter ALL over the staircase.
I'd say that I was only embarassed because of my age, but I would still be mortified if it happened today.
I could go on and on, but since we've never met fact to face I won't tell you about all the drunken escapades I'll always regret.
Oh my dear god. I just scrolled down to enter my word in the word verification box. Are you ready for this....
Mustatin
It sounds like it should be the name of some life saving drug.
Okay, if that's not good enough here is another one:
When I went into labor, I didn't realize I was in labor for at least 30 minutes. I thought I needed to poop. Although it felt like the worst poop ever! When I finally realized the pain was coming in increments, I was convinced I was in labor.
My email address: melner18@yahoo.com
Nov 30 my husband deployed. This is our first big one. No big deal, I'm just going to curl up under the covers for a few weeks and cry all day eating cookies or something, right? No. I was invited to an ornament exchange last night for the gift shop I volunteer at. How neat! I had my ornament and was determined I would go and have a good time.
I drove the 63 miles down to base. It was at a very high ranking officers' wives house. I asked the gate guard where admiral housing was and he pointed me in the direction I was familliar with for the CO (head boss) of the ship. No dice. There simply wasn't a road named after the one I was looking for. I stopped at the Navy Lodge (hotel on base) to ask for directions. They had NO CLUE where the road I was looking for was.
I get back into the car and reach into my purse to pull out my index card with the address on it to make sure I was looking for the right road and guess what isn't there? THE ORNAMENT! I ran over to the store on base and bought another one. The event started at 7... it is now about 7:15. I am opening tissue paper as I walk back to my car, ripping off price tags and shoving the ornament into a red lunch bag type gift bag because there were no cute ones.
I then get lost one more time and stop in at the I Bar, where all the pilots hang out. I walk in and try to ask the bartender where it is. They all look at me like I'm nuts, because I obviously left my flight suit at home. I then start to cry (in front of a bunch of rough tough salty navy pilots!). I tell her the name of the people and his rank and the light bulb goes off. I am on the wrong side of base.
I then have to haul it over to try to find the place, in the dark, crying, over a half hour late!
I find it and try to wipe my eyes enough to head in. The best part about the military community is that they've all been there, they all know the emotions, they all get the tears, but I was so embarassed. I need some relaxation in my life!
(sorry it was uber long! I should have written a post and directed you there!)
Little stories-
1) I went to China for one of my classes, we had some free time, but the main purpose was to meet businesses and see how they do things over there. I was jet lagged and tired. I put on my suit, shoes and jacket and meet up with the group one morning. We were on the bus for one hour, met with one company, were on our way to the second one, when a classmate asks why I have on two different shoes...one was black one was brown. Similar styles but differnet. I was stuck, I could't change. I had to suck it up and go the rest of the day wearing two different shoes. I am suprised it didn't become a fashion statement over there.
2) I was dating someone for a few months. We went walking in the woods and I got a case of the sneezes. The last sneeze was so powerful I peed my pants. First thing I did that next monday was make an appointment with the urologist (who just told me my bladder is super small and weak).
3)One night in a bar 9 years ago, I got too drunk and kissed four - six boys thinking it was the same guy...I was convinced it was the same guy - but it was not. I think friends were just lining up to kiss me.
dwagner818@gmail.com
About 7 years ago I worked at an ER that saw like 13 patients a day so, we had a lot of time on our hands. We used to do science experiments using shit we purchased from the vending machine (wheel of death). On that day, 3 nurses, some techs, and several of the doctors had gathered around the nurses station to see us test the theory that we could create a geyser from a bottle of coke a pack of mentos.
I'm always up for a good time. We opened the bottle of coke, poured a little out, and added a couple of mentos.
Don't ever test this theory, it works. As soon as it started spilling over the sides of the bottle, I grabbed it and took off toward the ambulance doors in a hard run. I was laughing so hard my effing feet got tangled and I went down. EVERYONE SAW. That damn coke went everywhere. All over the walls, and the code cart. NOT COOL. I looked back and the majority of the staff were laughing but a couple of them were rolling their eyes as they mummbled the word, "ok?". There you have it.
You're not going to believe this shit, a real word....
WVW: Chains
I need to win this!!! You know how to get ahold of me if I do :-)
bridgestranslation at yahoo dot com
In middle school I was a little chunky and very opinionated, this equaled an easy target for the cool kids. They were super mean-girl mean to me and I hated school with a passion. (This is not meant to be a sob story, I promise!) Well anyway, I was walking through the cafeteria one day and everyone had the jumbo L.L. bean bookbags which were sitting in the aisle. I definitely tripped over the bookbags in front of the whole school. That's not the worse part. Of course I started to cry and a teacher runs into the bathroom behind me. She then proceeds to tell me that I can't stay in the bathroom. I got made fun of for weeks for that.
I hope you're happy with my reliving my terrorizing moment from my childhood!
So, this Thanksgiving, one of my coworkers came over for dinner. She's originally from New York and has no family down here, so we invited her over. She is part-time at the station and also PT at Victoria's Secret.
Ninny, my mom's mom, was introduced to her, found out she worked at VS, lifted her shirt, and said, "I got my bra at Vanity Fair for $7.... do you guys have any like these?"
I about died.
Um....
Ok. A few years ago I picked up a night job waitressing & bartending to pay off my credit cards. I was still doing the corporate thing 8-5, but working at the restaurant in town a few evenings a week.l
I felt a little weird about it, especially when the corporate big wigs would come into the restaurant. And if I had to wait on them, I wanted to crawl under a table.
One night, when I was bartending the owner of the company came in and sat at one of the bar tables. I was doing really well, playing it cool, not making a fool of myself, until I missed a step coming out of the kitchen with his meal and fell right on my ass, right beside his table.
He still makes fun of me for it once in a while.
email address is: notmommyoftheyear at gmail.com (PS. Does spelling it out that way really help stop spam emails?)