Diary of a Fickle White Woman

I've been on an emotional roller coaster lately and have just really been yearning for some stability and peace with where I am in my life. My mom sent a prayer to me the other day that couldn't have been more perfect for how I have been feeling lately, and I thought I'd share it with all of you. The Knots Prayer Dear God: Please untie the knots that are in my mind, my heart and my life. Remove the have nots, the can nots and the do nots that I have in my mind. Erase the will nots, may nots, might nots that may find a home in my heart. Release me from the could nots, would nots and should nots that obstruct my life. And most of all, Dear God, I ask that you remove from my mind, my heart and my life all of the 'am nots' that I have allowed to hold me back, especially the thought that I am not good enough. Amen Hope you all are having a wonderful week

It's time for Ian 's "Monday Minute!" Although, with my length of answers, it's more like the Monday 20-Minute, but whatev bev. Wanna play along? Click the link to his name, copy/paste/answer the questions on your blog, link up at the bottom of his blog. Easy-peezy. So here we go! 1. What drugs have you done in your life? None. Never so much as touched a cigarette. Ever. Oh, crap, unless y'all consider alcohol a drug. Yea, I did go to college. A college that used to be one of the top party schools in the nation. And I did take "wine tasting" as my credit number 12 my last semester of college. My grandma's maiden name is Bierhaus (beer-house)... I came by it honestly. Why must I ramble? Simple answer: no real drugs, but I do drink (rarely). Goody goody, at your service. 2 . A/S/L? 23 (in less than a month), Female (duh, fickle white WOMAN). A suburb of Indianapolis, Indiana. That is what A/S/L stands for, right? I haven't been asked that since...

My girl Pennie, Mom Thoughts , gave me the Honest Scrap Award, truth or dare style (minus the dare, although that would be fun!)! And because I'm a rule follower, here's 10 confessions you probably never cared to know :p 1. I only stick up for myself when it comes to my family, every one else can pretty much walk all over me (unless you lie to me, in which case, I will roast your tush like a 'mallow at a campfire). Not something I am proud of, by any means, and has been a major source of frustration my entire life, but it is what it is. 2. Knowing I made someone laugh gives me an immeasurable amount of joy. I just love the thought of making someone's day a little brighter. 3. I'm really shy around people I'm not close to. Really, really shy. 4. My dreams: travel the world, become a wife and mother, live to be 100, make a difference in the world, be remembered as someone with a big personality and an even bigger heart. 5. I get migraines at least three times a mo...

When I lived in Hawai'i, I only made it over to the island of Maui for a quick day trip. I was kind of bummed, but no one else wanted to spend the money on it and most of my friends had done a week long cruise of the islands and had already seen Maui. I assumed my next chance to get back there and actually SEE the island would be when I'm married, perhaps on my honeymoon. I had no clue it would happen a short two years later. To make a long story short, the trip that my parents and I were supposed to take to Puerto Vallarta, Mexico last May ended up being cancelled two weeks before we were to leave-- thank you swine flu and drug lords. We ended up getting the week back for our timeshare, plus our airfare, plus an additional 1500 dollars in ticket vouchers. We were lucky. Anyhow, (long story short, remember), my mom and I ended up doing a girls trip to Maui the very week we should have been in Mexico. And if you've read, um, half of one of my posts, you know how much I am ob...

* I HATE working out. You know those people that say, "Oh, I love it once I get there, it's finding the motivation that's hard." Or the people that say, "Yea, I don't like working out either, but I feel so good afterwards." What a load of crap. I don't enjoy any part of working out. I don't like thinking about it, I don't like driving to work out, I don't like doing the actual work out (ask my trainer, he will confirm this as he has listened to my incessant bitching for over a year), and I do not enjoy any part of the aftermath. Who the hell likes being sore in places the Good Lord doesn't even know exists? Not me. And don't tell me you do either, I won't believe you-- even if you say it makes you feel good mentally. *I need a body transplant. Preferably that of Carrie Underwood or Halle Berry. But really, any body that functions like it should at 23 years of age would be fine. *American TV is so weird. And yet, I watch it. Li...

*UPDATE: Thank you for all of your feedback, I really appreciate it :) I know it's my blog and ultimately my decision, but y'all would be the benefactors of the giveaway, so I was just curious as to whether or not it as something you gave a hoot about :) I think I am going to *try* a giveaway and go from there. If I think it's fun, maybe I'll do one a few (as in, no more than 3)times a year; if I hate it and feel like it totally takes away from the point of my blog (which is really just to chornicle my life, I'd do it with or without even a single follower), I won't do it again. Whether or not the giveaway is from a company or a reader's etsy shop (my preference-- I like to support fellow bloggers!), I don't know yet, but there will be some sort of giveaway in the near future! A normal post will be up later tonight, including an embarrassing story from Anatomy class that happened a few minutes ago. Oy. Me and my big mouth!*** I received an email from a ...

This July 31st is my brother's 25th birthday. It will be 25 years since he was born six weeks premature and had to spend 15 days in the neonatal intensive care unit due to underdeveloped lungs. He was on 100% oxygen and was given his last rights by a priest. This May 20th is my 23rd birthday. It will be 23 years since I was born two weeks early and had to spend a measly 12 hours in the NICU due to fluid in my lungs. On February 5, 2008, my cousins, Max and Tyler, were born at a frighteningly early 26 weeks 1 day gestation. Though they were fortunate enough that their mother was able to receive three steroid shots prior to their birth, they spent 67 days in the NICU. Today, they are thriving miracles who, aside from their size, show no signs of having been born 14 weeks early. In fact, and Bridge, correct me if I am wrong, I believe they are AHEAD of not only their adjusted age, but also their REAL age! They truly are our little miracles, who I just happen to get to spend time with...